Perfect day to reflect on our 'Dad'n'

Father’s Day sneaked up on me this year.
I don’t feel much like a father these days. I’ve done my “fatherly” work, whether sufficient or not, and internal Vandy statistics would indicate a thumb sideways grade.
I watched out the front window Tuesday as the UPS guy dropped a box on my front porch. I started thinking about what I’ve ordered lately. Two bags of bird food, a can of bear spray…(we’re going to Big Beech Mountain in July with kids and a nephew that likes to pretend he's Bigfoot. I’ll take the capsaicin cloud when we’re out and about.) but I couldn’t think of anything else.
I went and grabbed the box to bring it inside. I don’t like leaving things on the porch in our world anymore.
It said my name on it and I am getting older so I thought, well, what’s this. I started to open the package and then thought better. If someone had sent me something I better find out who.
I put a text in the on-going thread I have saved between my daughter, Lee, and myself.
“Did someone send me a package?”
I waited about five minutes for the response.
“Me, Happy Father’s Day” with a smiley face emoji Taylor wrote.
“When is Father’s Day?”, I texted correcting about six typos.
“OHMYGAWD ARE YOU SERIOUS?!?!?!?,” the wife responds.
Yeah, I hadn’t given it any thought. Sometimes in passing at my brother’s house when the kids would mention his  Father’s Day, but I never connected the two.
Most men, I would assume and don’t mean to, plan Father’s Day with barbecues or golf or whatever. But usually around family. When you bach it, you forget about those things sometimes.
There were many people who asked what plans I had for the weekend and I didn’t realize they were asking me what I was doing for Father’s Day, but they don’t use the words. I just think they’re asking, ‘Whazzup’.
Maybe they’re uncomfortable using the phrase Father’s Day with me. Understood, but unnecessary. I still love being a dad. I think I’m still a dad to Kels and I know Taylor loves how much I ‘dad’ her.
But it is different for me. It’s not uncommon for me to watch other fathers interact with their children. Whether I know them or not, it fascinates me. Do I have my opinions, oh, for sure. Regularly I think they are too harsh, but that’s to be expected. I watch fathers give kids a couple bucks for popcorn at summer sporting events. The kids walk away with small smiles. A father took off for the concession stand Thursday night in Central Lee when his daughter yelled from the dugout she’d like a water. She stopped him saying they had some in the dugout. But he was off almost on a sprint.
'Dad’n’
We can make a verb out of it for one day a year.
I’m sure Facebook will be lit up with pictures of fathers and children, fathers and their fathers. As it should be. Honor the day, the heritage and the legacy of the fathers in your family. And if there’s a non-traditional father in your group, honor them, too.
It's not easy. And most will tell you that they have no clue what they’re doing other than trusting God’s path as the ultimate Father, and just being a good dude.
We forget sometimes about being a good dude even when it comes to discipline. My go to was to smile and tell my kids I loved them, but that’s not the way this is going to go. There were regrettable times when I raised my voice, but that’s what I was brought up around. I’m absolutely positive I’m done raising my voice around Taylor and Lee, there’s very little 'Dad’n’ in yelling at your family. Like anything, there are exceptions to the rule, but it should be rare and full throated with love as much as anything else.
If you’re 'dad’n’ today, Good on ya. Not only is it a day to celebrate your devotion, dedication, and direction for your children. It’s a day to think about the fathers in your tree that dad’d, too. But grill that steak or brat, or piece of salmon if you’re being heart healthy, have a beer or Jameson or WhistlePig, or a glass of tea. Sit back and reflect on how good you are, how good you’ve been, and how good you could still be.
But above all else, just have a day.
Happy Father’s Day to all my friends and familiy out there dad’n’ - and no socks with sandals, but that’s Beside the Point.
Chuck Vandenberg is editor and co-owner of Pen City Current and can be reached at Charles.V@PenCityCurrent.com.